Went to a cooking show last night and it was so much fun. The cooking demonstrator onstage created 10 different recipes over two hours, including appetizers, entrees and desserts:

APPETIZERS
Fall Harvest Salad
Smoked Salmon & Chives Cheesecake (also great as a party food)

PARTY FOODS & MUNCHIES
Snickerdoodle Chex® mix
Fresh fruit centerpiece

ENTREES
Cheesy Vegetable Chowder (smaller portions make a good appetizer, too)
Stuffed Manicotti with Spicy Sausage & Fresh Marinara Sauce
Mini Kentucky Hot Browns (can also be party food)
Stuffed Flank Steak Santa Fe

DESSERTS
Caramel Apple Twist (also great for breakfast)
Harlequin Cake

10 GREAT COOKING TIPS
The cooking demonstrator also offered several helpful tips that I am passing along to you:

1. Use 7-Up beverage instead of lemon juice to keep chopped apples from browning. (It has to be 7-Up; other lemon-lime drinks don’t do as well.)

2. Snip fresh herbs inside a plastic cup with kitchen shears to hasten clean-up.

3. Use stretchable silicone bands instead of string to truss a bird or stuffed steak.

4. Use slow cooker liners to avoid scrubbing. They are found on the plastic wrap aisle in the supermarket.

5. A wet paper towel underneath a thin flexible plastic cutting surface will help keep the cutting board from sliding on a polished counter.

6. Decorate food with chocolate leaves for fall; paint melted chocolate over washed fresh leaves and put in refrigerator. Peel chocolate off when leaves are cold. Use as garnish.

7. Try Head Chef cooking utensils for kids. They are adorable.

8. When oil and vinegar don’t stay mixed, use an emulsifier (such as cream) to blend and bind the two together so they won’t separate. Use equal parts oil and vinegar (1/4 cup each) and add twice the half-and-half (1/2 cup). Shake.

9. To make buttermilk when you don’t have any, measure one tablespoon vinegar and then fill up the same measuring cup with enough milk to equal one cup. Refrigerate. You should have homemade buttermilk in about 15 minutes.

10. Freeze cake lightly to cut down on crumbs getting mixed up in the frosting.
Wouldn’t you know it. Ruth came with me to the cooking show and was so enthralled by the onstage cooking production that she neglected to visit the ladies room until it was almost too late.  She was in a bit of a hurry once inside the single restroom, but got sidetracked by a puzzling development: she had no place to put her purse! (Oh my, never on the dirty floor!!)    There was a large pedestal sink, no hooks anywhere, and no drop-down panel for packages. What to do?

Nearly desperate for relief, Ruth flung her purse into the sink and proceeded about her business. All of a sudden, the automatic water faucet cheerily filled her purse with several measures of water.

Shall we say Ruth certainly made a splash?

Happy cookbooking,

Matilda

(P.S. This is not a recipe I would recommend for the family cookbook!)

Happy cookbooking anyway,

Matilda

Chocolate banana split cake

Two of my favorite flavors are chocolate and banana. I don’t usually eat them together, but one day last week I had a desire for a nice slice of chocolate cake. There were two bananas on the counter (sorry, banana trees are for monkeys), so I thought why not make that Chocolate Banana Split Cake my cousin, Jean Brown Craft Batts, raved about a few years ago.

It just so happened that the local ladies club was having a dessert social that day and had invited members to bring a favorite sweet to share. Thank goodness! I really didn’t want to have to eat the whole Chocolate Banana Split Cake by myself.

I had already entered the Chocolate Banana Split Cake recipe into my family cookbook using my cookbook software. I located it easily by using the “Go To” search field at the bottom of the “Recipes” template.  I simply typed in Chocolate Banana Split Cake, and it popped up effortlessly from the hundreds of family recipes within my family cookbook.

CHOCOLATE BANANA SPLIT CAKE
1 box chocolate cake mix, prepared according to package directions
2 small packages instant vanilla pudding
1 12-ounce can reduced fat evaporated milk
2 medium firm bananas, sliced
1 8-ounce can crushed pineapple, drained
1 8-ounce carton Cool Whip
3 Tablespoons chopped pecans
3 Tablespoons chocolate syrup
5 Maraschino cherries, chopped

Combine all ingredients listed on the chocolate cake mix box, and bake in a 9-inch x 13-inch oblong pan (sprayed with Pam). When cooled, cut chocolate cake in half lengthwise, creating two long thin layers. Stir milk into instant pudding mix, following package directions. Mix pudding until slightly thickened.

Spread ½ of pudding over the bottom layer of the chocolate cake, then top it with sliced bananas.  Add the second chocolate cake layer, and continue topping it with the remaining instant pudding and bananas, followed by a layer of pineapple, and then Cool Whip on top.  Sprinkle with nuts and drizzle with chocolate syrup. Top with cherries.  Refrigerate at least one hour before serving. Eat!

I spent most of the morning tending to the Chocolate Banana Split Cake, eager to have my slice of chocolate cake at last (now enhanced with goodies similar to a banana split at the ice cream parlor).  As I recall, Jean told me this recipe for Chocolate Banana Split Cake was adapted from a popular Southern recipe being exchanged called Banana Split Cake.  I carefully placed the cherries on top, and had just enough time to chill it and dress for the party.

When I arrived at the clubhouse for the ladies club dessert social, I got out of the car with the Chocolate Banana Split Cake in tow. I was so proud it had survived several high bumps in the parking lot as I cautiously maneuvered over them slow enough to race a certain shelled garden creature (one I find so repulsive that I refuse to identify).

Then it happened. I somehow tripped over the neighborhood feral cat while it skittered across the parking lot, presumably away from the loose dog on the sidewalk. While I did the splits, the Chocolate Banana Split Cake did the splats.

I wasn’t injured, but the Chocolate Banana Split Cake was top down on the pavement with no hope of recovery.

Darn, I sure did want to try that Chocolate Banana Split Cake recipe!  Maybe I will make it again soon, as I never did get my slice of chocolate cake that day.  This time I’ll invite a few neighbors close to home…

We all have our moments, and today I had one that’s too good not to share. This morning I was thirstier than usual, and really wasn’t in the mood for a cup of decaf or green tea after my workout. So I thought, instead of just water, how about one of those cold, fancy frappe-type iced coffee drinks instead?

I’ve had these iced coffee drinks at the coffee bars. I’m a cookbook software entrepreneur, and I’ve been around long enough to be able to figure out how to do this simple iced coffee beverage and not have to run out to get one for around $40 dollars a gallon (and we think gas prices are high).

So here’s what I did to make my iced coffee drink:

1 tsp decaf instant coffee
2 tsp Hershey’s unsweetened cocoa powder
8 oz. non-fat milk (it froths and thickens better than whole)
1 packet sugar substitute (or 2 teaspoons regular sugar, or to taste)
2 cups of ice cubes

Into my blender container, I added the ice and sweetener packet as the foundation to my iced coffee drink. I quickly dissolved the coffee and cocoa in a little hot water from my instant hot water dispenser (can’t wait for the microwave anymore), and poured it in. (Another shortcut to an iced coffee drink is a hot chocolate packet mixed with coffee with no sweetener added.) Then I used the milk to rinse out the small cup that contained the dissolved coffee and cocoa, and poured it all into the blender over the ice.

When I pushed the “blend” button, the blender began to purr. There was my anticipated iced coffee drink whirring around in the blender, ice being hurtled and chopped and non-fat milk nicely thickening the whole concoction.

Pleased with myself, I turned around for just a moment to let the dog out. In that moment, about half of the blender’s iced coffee drink contents leaked onto the granite countertop. It wasn’t until I finished sopping up the mess that I noticed a new brown pattern on my white kitchen wall. Oh well. What was left in the blender container of my iced coffee drink was pretty good, and maybe not barista quality, but just fine for me.

Next time I make an iced coffee drink, I just have to remember to screw the blender blade on tighter!

“Honey, you don’t want to get feathers in the salsa,” I shouted to Ruth over the song “It’s Raining Men.”

It was a Red Hat party, and Ruth was drinking a daiquiri. It was virgin, but the grandmother of seven still seemed a little dizzy. Maybe it was the Chippendale dancer beefcake strutting on the stage in front of her. She pulled her red feather boa away from the dip. “It could only improve it,” she giggled. “Honestly, Sharon makes a much better salsa. Her trick is to use fresh pineapple.”

This wasn’t exactly a Red Hat party, to be honest. There were only ten of us. The real Red Hat party was in three weeks. We were supposed to be the Red Hat Party Planning Committee, but as is often the case we were easily distracted.

Sharon set a folded dollar bill on the stage and smiled smugly. I think it was about the salsa compliment, but it might have had something to do with the blond hunk with the rock hard abs who’d just wiggled in front of her. She was the one who convinced us “The Official Red Hat Party” Organizing Party of the Red Hat Party Planning Committee had to happen in front of male strippers.

“You know,” she said, “we ought to use Matilda’s software to make a cookbook for the upcoming party.”

I was stunned. I hadn’t thought we’d actually get around to talking about the “real” party. But I was also ready. “Well,” I said, “I’ve got a template designed with lots of red hats in it. Nice and red and purple. It’s not officially endorsed by The Red Hat Society or anything–”

“Neither is Butch over there!” Ruth blurted, her eyes fixed on a very uncomfortable-looking thong.

“–but,” I continued, “I think it’d be perfect. We’ll ask everybody to email each other their favorite recipes, and we can vote on which ones we’ll put in our Unofficial Completely Unauthorized Underground Illegal Red Hat Party Cookbook at the party. I’ll take the recipes we decide on there and get a cookbook done in a week or two.”

Ruth looked at me for the first time in an hour. She mumbled something I couldn’t quite hear about pineapple and feathers. I mouthed “What?”, and the music cut suddenly as she shouted, “I want that man dipped in salsa!”

Needless to say, the business portion of “The Official Red Hat Party” Organizing Party of the Red Hat Party Planning Committee adjourned in shrieks of grandmotherly cackles.

If your Red Hat group is interested in making it’s own Unofficial Completely Unauthorized Underground Illegal Red Hat Party Cookbook, click here for the template.