For lack of a better name, let’s call the egg Humpty Dumpty. A few days ago I was shopping for groceries and realized I needed eggs. Spoiled by another grocery store down the road that often offers flats of 20 extra large eggs for a very good price, I reluctantly perused the egg display at the supermarket I was patronizing.
The egg prices were quite high in price, comparatively speaking. I looked at a carton of reasonably-priced medium size eggs, and they looked so puny they hardly seemed worth the effort of breaking them. Certainly not an eggceptional Easter egg by any stretch of the imagination.
I looked at the large eggs. They were only 30 cents higher. But they appeared not much larger and seemed inferior to what I had been purchasing elsewhere.
So (against my nature to pay yet another 20 cents more), I thought that I should at least look at the jumbo eggs since I was already at this store and had no real desire to go elsewhere just for eggs, even an eggceptional Easter egg.
The first carton of jumbo eggs was substantial and probably worth the extra four cents an egg it was going to cost me. I replaced that carton on the shelf and pulled out the third carton on the front row stack. Opening the carton to check for breakage, I was stunned by what I saw.
The most extra jumbo gigantor egg I’d ever seen! ” Whoa,” I said. There was no question that this egg was coming home with me as an eggceptional Easter egg for my husband. He likes to make breakfast, and this eggceptional Easter egg would be one big surprise for him when he prepared to cook the morning eggs.
I finished my shopping and went through the check out line. The bagger, always an unusually friendly fellow who seems to love his job, was conscientious enough to check my eggs. Whoa, that is the biggest egg I’ve ever seen, he exclaimed. Look at that! He paraded the open carton of eggs to the checker and the checker next door and all those waiting in line. They were all amazed.
“Just think what size chicken that must have been,” I quipped. ” Now you know why chicken legs are getting bigger and bigger.”
I made sure the eggceptional Easter egg was intact in its carton in the refrigerator. Next morning I asked my husband if he’d seen his Easter egg. ” No, not that I know of.” I proceeded to direct him to the refrigerator and to the egg carton. He opened it with trepidation.
” Whoa, that is the biggest egg I’ve ever seen,” he said, clutching his chest in disbelief, mouth ajar and staring at the extra jumbo gigantor egg in the carton before him.
Before we cracked Humpty Dumpty, we just had to preserve the moment for posterity. I took photos. In the carton next to the other jumbos. Out and next to the carton with another jumbo nearby for comparison. In my husband’s hands. Back in the carton sideways with a tape measure. Jumbo to Gigantor resting on teaspoons. Every possible way I could think of to document the egg’s sheer immensity.
Then we ate it.
Matilda


